Today I had a doctor's appointment, and afterward my husband and I stopped by Costco to grab a couple small items and to get our tires rotated. Funny thing is moments like this are like dates for us because we so rarely get time away (alone)! LOL We are so easy to please, and such cheap dates! So anyways, we were sitting in the food court waiting for our tires to get done, and we ran into a friend...no surprise there! Costco is always a happening place where reconnections happen! As we were visiting with this friend she was sharing how her adult son is doing, and how her and her husband are handling all that they have on their plate. As she was ending she shared something her husband told her in encouragement for the road they are walking with their son. He had told her that "they need to do and give their very best for their son, but divorce themselves from the outcome because they can't control that. That they need to just trust that God has the outcome in His hands".
This struck a deep cord in my heart. God has been speaking to me all day since through that word she shared from her husband. You see, there are several things in life right now that I have been feeling God asking me to do my best with what I can, and just trust Him with the outcomes. But am I really ready to "divorce" myself from them...knowing the outcomes aren't a reflection of me? Can I trust that whatever the outcomes are that God has my best interest in mind, even if the outcome isn't what I wanted, hoped for, and prayed for? My heart wants to scream "Yes! I trust You Jesus!" But at the same time my mind begins to wander to the "what ifs" of life, and the side of the coin that I don't want circumstances in life to land on. What if I have to walk those harder roads?
TRUST was the word I was given early in this year. A word I felt like I was supposed to cling to through this year. I remember when I first got that word I shared it on Facebook, and also shared how I was nervous getting that word because what was to come? What would God stretch me in...trust isn't always an easy thing to learn. It is a good attribute, but it usually comes through trials. So each time I hear God whisper to my heart to "Trust Him", I find myself thinking..."Okay God...I trust You. But please help me if things don't turn out like I want them to. The other side of that coin scares me." My head and heart struggle to align.
Tonight as I was driving home from a women's study a song came on the road. Sometimes as I am driving the music playing is just in the background and I don't really hear the words, but the chorus of a song struck me. I turned the radio up to really hear what the words were, and what I heard was...
"So let it go my soul and trust in Him. The wind and waves still know His name"
"So let it go my soul and trust in Him. The wind and waves still know His name"
In this moment I again heard God speak softly to my heart to just "Trust Him". To let go of the outcomes - to divorce myself from them - and KNOW he loves me so much, and has me in His hand and will take care of the outcome and results.
Jesus I TRUST You!
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